Friday, October 21, 2005



The Battle of The Big-Boobed Burqa-Wearing Bimbo


According to the Danish Newspaper The Copenhagen Post, the editors at Jyllands Posten decided to publish cartoons, depicting Mohammed in a humorous manner, as a way to test whether religious freedom was being threatened by Islamic extremism:


The front page of Jyllands-Posten featured prominently on many of the four collages. The newspaper has been criticised by Muslims for printing the cartoons, and was forced to hire security guards after receiving hate mail and death threats over the telephone.

The newspaper asked illustrators to make the cartoons after reports that artists were reluctant to illustrate a book on Mohammed for fear of Muslim retribution. The daily's editors said the cartoons were a test of whether the threat of Islamic terrorism had limited the freedom of expression in Denmark.


This has got me to thinking of possible ways in which this "War on Terror" can be clarified for people as time passes. For quite a while, here on CUANAS, I've been saying that if we don't wake up and fight, one day we will be hit with a terrorist attack so large that we will be forced to wake up. However, the editors at Jyllands-Posten have just shown us a possible way to avoid such an inevitability.

Constant and strategic agitation against the Jihadi mindset will expose the weaknesses of their philosophy. We may be fighting the first war where humor is as important a weapon as guns and bombs.

The more we shell the Jihadis with derisive humor, the more angry they will get. Eventually, their anger will spill over into public displays of idiocy, or even violence. This is exactly what is happening in response to the Jyllands-Posten Mohammed cartoons:


Daily newspaper Berlingske Tidende reported that the internet collages, posted in the name of an unknown organisation calling itself 'The Glory Brigades in Northern Europe', showed pictures of various tourist attractions in Denmark and stated that 'The Mujahedeen have numerous targets in Denmark - very soon you all will regret this', amongst other things. Another picture showed soldiers, armed with bombs, over a map of Denmark, with blood spattered over parts of the country.


In addition, the embassies of Muslim countries are demanding apologies:


Daily newspaper Jyllands-Posten's decision to print twelve cartoons featuring Muslim prophet Mohammed has caused a stir among Muslim countries, daily newspaper Politiken reported on Thursday. A number of Muslim countries with embassies in Denmark have sent a protest to Prime Minister Anders Fogh Rasmussen and the Ministry of Foreign Affairs about the caricatures.

'We are hoping for understanding about Muslims' feelings about Mohammed. And we're hoping for an apology from Jyllands-Posten,' said Mascud Effendy Hutasuhut, minister counsellor at the Indonesian Embassy. In addition to Indonesia, a number of Arab states, Pakistan, Iran, and Bosnia-Herzegovina have complained about the cartoons, which they see as a hate campaign against Muslims in Denmark.


Such behavior on the part of Islamic government officials displays frightening lack of respect, or even understanding for free speech among Muslims in general. This may be the first time, since the "War on Terror" began that Islamic disrespect for free speech has been brought home so clearly to Europeans. It, apparently, is such a shock that even the Archbishop of Canterbury has been moved to make a particularly unDhimmi-like statement:


Muslims and members of other religions should get used to being mocked, the former Archbishop of Canterbury said yesterday. Lord Carey of Clifton said he passionately believed it was good for members of a religion to have their faith criticised on certain occasions.

Speaking as a member of an all-party group of peers opposing the Racial and Religious Hatred Bill, Lord Carey said he wanted to live in a society where people were sensitive to the feelings of others. "But in being sensitive, what we mustn't do is create a society in which certain stories are not told," Lord Carey told a news conference.


The Archbishop of Canterbury, in case you don't remember, is a fierce opponent of the war, and of George Bush.

Now, here's the thing, if the relatively minor uproar of Islamic threats and protestations, which have thus far occurred, can lead to such positive results, imagine what could be done with some seriously surreal and Dadaistic mockery.

Truth is, we already have seen what happens when we desecrate the Koran. The Jihadis turned into a pack of wild animals over that, and the Western media worked with them to create the impression that something bad had actually occurred.

But, what we can learn from that is our technique needs to be a little more creative, and a little less bludgeonly obnoxious. Actually, I think it would suffice to simply turn any mockery into an event. Send out Press Releases, invite crowds, and mock, mock, mock.

I see women in burkas carrying big veiny, caucasian-skinned sex toys. I see men with bomb belts strapped on which explode in flowers and gay pride songs. I see Korans used as coasters for bottles of Budweiser.

I'm open to suggestions.

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