Monday, August 20, 2007

Michael Vick Will Plead Guilty
Ok Fine, Here's What He Should Say

I used to run an Advertising Agency, so I have an interest in Public Relations. In fact, I have had to write not a few Press Releases for my clients in my time. Here's what Michael Vick should say, in my opinion:

"I, Michael Vick, just want to tell you all that, not only am I sorry to have hurt you, but that I must admit that I now know that my actions are so beyond the bounds of what is morally acceptable to society, that I realize I must be a mentally ill human being.

As such, I intend to seek Psychological help, so that I can learn the root source of my illness. I believe that only by coming to understand what causes my sick behavior can I learn to overcome such behavior in the future.

I believe it is my responsibility to those who I have hurt, and to society at large to go through this process. I hope that you will all have patience with me, and pray for my recovery."

Now understand, I am saying this is what he should say, if he ever wants to be able to get back into the good graces of the public again.

His own real moral accountability is another thing entirely. That's between him and his Maker.

Here's what the idiots who are handling him told him to say:

"After consulting with his family over the weekend, Michael Vick asked that I announce today that he has reached an agreement with federal prosecutors regarding the charges pending against him," Martin's statement said.

"Mr. Vick has agreed to enter a plea of guilty to those charges and to accept full responsibility for his actions and the mistakes he has made."

"Michael wishes to apologizes again to everyone who has been hurt by this matter."

Now, does that statement sound like a pile of horseshit, or what? Does it make you feel ready to forgive Michael Vick and go on?